Wondering how to heal from estrangement? There is little doubt that estrangement is widespread, complicated, and harms all involved. Perhaps you have chosen to cut off from a family member out of necessity. Your experience may include abuse, poor parenting, parental alienation, and divorce. The condition of estranged is harmful. Maybe someone has chosen to physically or emotionally distance themselves from you.
Being estranged along with whatever destructive behaviors has the potential to alter one’s mental state. The common thread is between the estranged, and the one who chooses to estrange is suffering. Healing is the process of persevering toward overcoming. Decide to improve your mental and physical state to strengthen your ability to be restored and balanced. This article discusses How to Heal From Estrangement and Four Tips on What to Do to Heal When Estranged.
1. Practice Self-Care
When dealing with stressful conditions, especially in estrangement, you already know that intentionally caring for yourself is how we improve our mood and outlook.
So getting enough sleep, eating well, a regular movement or exercise regimen, having a regular meditation or yoga practice, praying, being mindful, learning breathing techniques to calm you, practicing gratitude, and having a support network.
When you’re stressed and depleted, you need to practice self-care to fill your reservoir. Self-care helps us manage stress and feel better. Manage stress with practical tips that balance your physical and mental state. Self-care is the foundation of healing.
Healing means learning to live again amid the reality of losing the relationship status. Your pain will come in waves, and taking care of yourself will help you to be able to strengthen yourself as you continue to grieve the loss.
2. Practice Mindfulness
Be mindful of how you think and how you feel. It is a non-judgemental approach where you observe your feelings and thoughts without pushing them aside or stuffing them.
Yes, acknowledge the feeling, take time to process it, cry if you choose to, then decide to redirect yourself to something that pleases you.
Estrangement has no determined endpoint, we have so much uncertainty, and it can leave us feeling unsettled. If you’re taking time to allow yourself to process, meaning getting into the nitty-gritty of what you think, identifying feelings like bitterness, rage, jealousy, despair, and rejections deserve attention. Journal writing can be an excellent tool in landing. Once you have done an emotional visit, then redirect.
Redirecting means intentionally moving forward toward activities that bring pleasure to you.
Being with a pet, being with people who love and value you, engaging in a hobby, finding gratitude. Whatever you decide, be sure to redirect.
When you need to pull back and have another emotional visit, do so and redirect yourself again.
Healing is a process, not a destination.
You can become more robust and have more control by being mindful of how long you feel pain, being aware of things you do that increase your pain and how it is affecting other areas of your life,
3. Be Compassionate
As humans, we are so compassionate with others that we extend kindness and patience.
What if we committed to treating ourselves as we would our dearest friend?
Estrangement is like going through a personal hell, and it is miserable,
Being self-critical, demeaning, judgemental, condemning, and impatient with yourself works against healing. Compassion is how healing flows.
4. Get Support
There is no substitute for someone who can guide us and support us in our healing journey.
It is vital not to isolate. Instead, gather with people who love and value you.
A professional who can be in your corner can assist you in staying the course so you can find your healing journey. It is a process. Remember to tell yourself you are doing the best you can and did the best you could.
Estrangement is widespread, complicated, and harms all involved. Perhaps you have chosen to cut off from a family member out of necessity. Your experience may include abuse, poor parenting, parental alienation, and divorce. The condition of estranged is harmful. Maybe someone has chosen to physically or emotionally distance themselves from you. Being estranged along with whatever destructive behaviors has the potential to alter one’s mental state. The common thread is between the estranged, and the one who chooses to estrange is suffering. Healing is the process of persevering toward overcoming. Decide to improve your mental and physical state to strengthen your ability to be restored and balanced. This article discusses How to Heal From Estrangement and Four Tips on What to Do to Heal When Estranged.
Get The eBook: Feeling Heartbroken and Alone? How to Pick Up the Pieces When You are Estranged.
Resources:
- Agllias, Kylie. Family Estrangement A Matter Of Perspective. New York, Routledge, 2017.
- Coleman, Joshua. Rules of Estrangement. New York, Harmony Books, 2020.
- Morin, Marie. Feeling Heartbroken and Alone? How to Pick Up the Pieces When You are Estranged. eBook. 2022.
- Morin, M.L. [Morin Holistic Therapy]. (2022, January 4 ). What is Family Estrangement? You Are Not Alone.
- Morin, M.L. [Morin Holistic Therapy]. (2021, September 8). Diaphragmatic Breathing: 5 Minute Deep Breathing Exercise for Beginners.
- Morin, Marie. How to Deal with Estranged Family During the Holidays (2021, November 21) Sixty and Me. https://sixtyandme.com/estranged-family-holidays/
- Pillemer, Karl. Fault Lines Fractured Families and How to Mend Them. New York Penguin Random House, 2020.
